"Take this sinking boat and point it home, we've still got time"

The last few days have been full of reconnections with old friends, meaningful conversations, and words that inspire greatness. Steps towards dreams, plans to go abroad, and hoping beyond hope to visit loved ones very soon. The last few days have reaffirmed my belief that because May was such a complete disastor, June is going to be fabulous.

Bleeding Hearts

"It might be desirable to get away, really away, further away than little grey-green England, but this privilege was evidently to be denied her. Deep in her soul--deeper than any appetite for renunciation--was the sense that life would be her business for a long time to come. And at moments there was something inspiring, almost enlivening in the conviction. It was a proof of strength--it was proof she should someday be happy again. It couldn't be she was to live only to suffer; she was still young, after all, and a great many things might happen to her yet. To live only to suffer--only to feel the injury of life repeated and enlarged--it seemed to her she was too valuable, too capable, for that."
(The Portrait of a Lady)

The Together Women

Every morning on my walk to work I'm surrounded by women. Women that embody the word together with their smooth, shiny hair, perfect make-up, and cobbled shoes. They never looked rushed or particularly hurried toting their lattes in their freshly manicured hands. They are the types of women that wear white pants without spilling anything, match their accessories to their shoes, and can fit everything a lady needs into one tiny purse. They remember to drop off clothes at the dry cleaners, they never run out of toilet paper, and they iron on Sundays to avoid hectic weekdays.

A good friend of mine frequently says my personality matches my hair: organized chaos. I will never be able to walk down 18th street without being weighed down by my over sized purse, gym bag, and occasional shot put. I will probably always chew my fingernails, forget dry cleaning, take three days to read the Sunday paper, and have stacks of articles on my desk. I'll wait months to get clothes tailored or dry-cleaned, leave my apartment without my keys, and forget my umbrella every time it rains.

On my way to work this morning I wondered if I could ever be mistaken for one of these together women, if by chance some passerby glanced at me without noticing my wrinkled coat, crazy hair, chipped fingernails, and scuffed shoes? But before I could give it another moments thought, I tripped and spilled my coffee with such momentum that it splattered all over my over sized sunglasses. It was then I realized that some things will just never be.

"Am I more than you bargained for yet?"

There is nothing worse than waiting. Waiting for interview results, waiting to go home for the holidays, waiting for change. I feel like I'm on "pause" and its the most frustrating feeling. Especially when others expect you to fast-forward.

Cloud 9

This week's run down:

• Met Caroline Kennedy, otherwise known as the daughter of the man who inspired me to go into human rights work; also known as the daughter of the woman who has profoundly influenced my style and taste.
• One job offer
• Two great job interviews
• Put a significant dent in the Christmas shopping

The view is pretty darn good from here!

I'll keep you locked in my head until we meet again...

I've been pretty terrible about updating lately- mostly because of long hours at work- life has been a bit of a blur. But all in all things are going well. Some random updates:

• I'm still living with a bunch of guys in a little bit of a frat house situation- not ideal- but they're wonderful and its perfect until I know whether or not I'm staying in DC after the holidays.
• Work is great- I absolutely love what I'm doing. Lots of foreign policy research and keeping a close eye on the 08 presidential candidates. I'm going out to Iowa again next week for the Hunger Summit- very exciting. I'm hoping to meet a few political VIPs. I will see Coll which makes the trip worth it regardless...
• Coll who is ENGAGED. The first one of my bests to be engaged... CRAZY! So there is some serious celebrating to be done.
• I've been writing a lot which is positive. I'm considering a few free lance ventures. I t may take up more time than I have at the moment, but I've always been a damn good multi-tasker...
• I've also been working on my french- I am determined to be CONSIDERABLY better by Christmas. I'm on quite a roll right now so its just a matter of sticking with it.
• I've been looking into some open track meets because I really miss competing and feel like I start to go a little crazy when I don't have a competitive outlet. AND when I was home a few weeks ago and caught up with my old track coach we pulled a shot put out of the garage and it went well... DAMN well. So we'll see. It'd be a great way to amp up my workouts. I've been just working out aimlessly lately which is not nearly as fun.
• I need to get more sleep because these dark circles I'm rockin these days are just not cool.

Peace out cubscouts!